I introduce to you, NoSQKitty
With this dialog, I had to do this. I had no choice, really. Trust me. Just ask Biznis Kitty.
Emmet: I’m just gonna come right out, I have no idea what’s going on or what this place is at all.
Unikitty: Hi! I am Princess Unikitty, and I welcome you all to Cloud Cuckoo Land!
Emmet: So there are no signs or anything. How does anyone know what not to do?
Unikitty: Here in Cloud Cuckoo Land, there are no rules. There’s no government, no baby sitters, no bedtimes, no frowny faces, no bushy moustaches, and no negativity of any kind.
Lucy: You just said the word "no" like a thousand times.
Unikitty: And there’s also no consistency.
Batman: [the clown and the lizard man are dancing around him] I hate this place.
Every single line in that scene had me choking on my popcorn. There’s a blog post in each one. No rules? Nope, not in schemaless. No signs? Nope. No bedtimes? Nope, none. As a matter of fact, I want to make up t-shirts with each of these lines. Everything is Awesome about them.
I’m not anti-cloud, at all. Nor am I anti-NoSQL (Hey, I know that’s a double negative. Don’t blame me that the name NoSQL seriously needs rebranding.) Plus, with a Starbucks name of Kitty, this is *so* my character. Cloud Cuckoo Land and all.
*And I really do get what eventual consistency is all about. I know it means there is consistency. I know when it’s perfect for solving a problem. I’m just quoting Unikitty. Blame her. But watch out for Angry Kitty if you do that.